It’s begun

Well, the house is officially on the market.

Boy, that sentence sure comes with a punch in the gut for me.*ouch*

I am not sure whether I want to laugh, cry, sigh or puke. Maybe if we were moving because we really want to and decided we want to relocate, it would be easier. Maybe if we were upgrading and not downsizing. Maybe…maybe…maybe. I know that things happen. Things that are out of our control and we have the choice to make the best of it or fight it and be miserable. Right now, though, I am sad.

I feel like crying over all of it. Yet, I know that my family needs at least one cheerleader trying to keep everyone positive. I don’t know why it is hitting me so hard. I was the one who was the most adjusted to the idea of the move. Now, I want to punch someone for making us go through this.

I want to be able to look at my kids and tell them how great it will be and that everything will be okay. And make them believe that. Right now.

I want to be able to look at my husband and tell him that we are doing the right thing and that everything is fine…that I am fine.

I want to make all of them stop worrying about it and being upset about it, but I don’t think I am very effective with that right now either. I am trying, though. With all of my being, I am trying to help all of them be okay with this.

When the realtor was here earlier, I wanted to pull a “Brady Bunch” and pretend the house was haunted so that they would get the hell out of my home. Of course, I then remembered that this is not a family sitcom and I am not living in the 70’s.

I know deep in my heart the fact of the matter is that we are doing what is best for our family. I just wish the broken part of my heart would figure that out…and fast.

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